Why do we always end up...

Dear Google,

My beloved friend, I am finally back. Took that long trip to the cave. Fasted. Meditated long and hard till there wasn't a spot left on my behind that wasn't sore. Next time I'll pick a cave with a soft dirt floor.

And then the question jumped at me. Had to run like crazy, avoiding fierce Macedonian sheep dogs and mean, angry farmers and motorists who wouldn't get out of my way, but I'm back in the swivel seat now, facing you. The incense is lit and the virgins are being herded for the sacrifice as I type. All for you.

I would like to begin by asking the question that burns in the mind, heart and slowly shrinking belly of every western man and woman, regardless of race, creed, moral standing, intellectual capacity or odontic condition. The question that you get when you put together the experience garnered from several billion years' worth of evolution, dice it, grind it, mash it, boil it and distill it repeatedly until you get the most vital essence of what we have come to know as being. That shining drop of liquid in a vial you then end up holding for a few moments before you take a picture of it to upload on the fleamarket website.

The question is (Be still my heart. Forgive, Dear Google, the trembling of my fingers as I type the words): "Why do we always end up voting for the lesser of two evils and still call ourselves a Democracy?" Why do we always have for our leaders a choice between two jokers that none of us would want to invite to our home, our office or even the badminton club? Why do we even need to bother when all they ever do is take us places no one in their right minds would even consider going to? Please answer me. I desperately need to know.

Thank you and please to Click the Searchy button. Here comes your esteemed response.

Let's see, let's see:

Topping the results list is the 'Dynamite Redhead'

Devvy Kidd -- Voting Lesser of Two Evils Won't Save America

The issue of whether someone should vote for the "lesser of two evils" this .... Democracy is defined as mob rule. No democracy in the history of this world ...

This looks interesting. She writes:

The issue of whether someone should vote for the "lesser of two evils" this November has become very contentious in recent months with friends and relatives clashing to the point of creating hard feelings. Sadly, most Americans don't really recognize that they are being deliberately herded into this direction to keep them in line and "faithful" to either the Democrat or Republican parties.

Sun-Tzu is considered one of the greatest military tacticians of all time. I have learned much from studying his strategies as well as Francis Marion aka The Swamp Fox. The herding technique is one of the most effective methods of manipulating those to be conquered into the right direction. I use a bull and cape metaphor on my web site to illustrate this, but basically, this is how it works:

The power brokers behind the scenes make sure their puppet candidate is the only one offered up to the voters on a party ticket. The voters of either party (Democrat or Republican) don't want that candidate, but feel they have no choice. Then comes the pressure about party loyalty and in the end, the people are manipulated into voting for a candidate they don't want, but the power brokers got exactly what they wanted.

Oh, I very much like this Devvy woman already.

Hold your nose and vote. Doesn't anyone see anything wrong with this picture? I do. I liken it to a form of insanity: continuing to do the same thing that brings the same bad results. Like an addiction.

People are forgetting what the Constitution says

As both [CandidateX] and [CandidateY] continue to promise every special interest group and PAC in the country more and more unconstitutional looting of the people's treasury, Americans have forgotten what a sitting President can and cannot do in his capacity. One thing a President cannot do is go to war without a formal declaration by Congress. Clinton did it over in the Balkans and Bush has done it in the Middle East. They both should have been impeached.

Got to wipe a tear, she has taken the words right out of my keyboard.

No President can promise funds from the people's treasury which, incidentally, has no money and every penny promised comes from borrowing. All bills of expenditure must originate in the House of Representatives, not from the President's desk. Presidents are not supposed to create jobs, the private sector must take that lead role in a free market system. Under communism, the government creates the jobs and the slaves; free enterprise is forbidden.

As disgusting as it is, most Americans today vote for their paychecks, whether it be at the city, county state or federal level. Because our manufacturing, industrial and agriculture sectors - the very industries that made America the most prosperous, debt free country in the history of the world - have been gutted by insidious treaties like NAFTA & GATT, more and more Americans are taking the largess from the people's treasury to fund their city, county, state and federal jobs. Most of these jobs have no constitutional authority and far too many are simply bribes to keep the masses in line by throwing them scraps wrapped up with deceit and deception.

How come none of those overpaid servants of justice who've sworn oaths to uphold the Constitution haven't thought of this already? Or have they? And if so, were their fingers crossed behind their backs?

Our nation was built on 'citizen candidates.' For the past 50 years, only those vetted by the machine that will march to the orders given by the shadow government ever make it on election day. This is a direct result of vote fraud and the unwillingness of Americans to stand up for what they believe and cave into party loyalty pressure. I maintain that it is un-American to continue voting for the same individuals who are destroying this country because the party is everything, win at all costs. Such foolhardiness has damn near destroyed this Republic.

George Bush, Jr., is a representative of the Russian, Chinese, U.S. Communitarian ruling classes bent on destroying America and integrating her into this one world government nightmare.

O.K. Whoa, there! Slow down. Next we'll be hearing that old 'Reagan was a Socialist' line. Where were you, Devvy, when Armed Forces Radio played that jingle about how "the U.S. Air Force is here to do the same job as Santa Claus?" That is, "to bring peace to the world?"

These United States of America's legal form of government is a Constitutional Republic. The word 'Democrat' means "a supporter of democracy." Democracy is defined as mob rule. No democracy in the history of this world has ever survived and that is a historical fact. Republican is defined as "favoring a republic as the best form of government." Tragically for this nation, the Republican Party hasn't stood for those principles in a century. Either the American people are going to get out of a state of denial or the ship will go down and voting for the lesser of two evils won't save it.

I'd say the lower decks have already been scuttled but, never mind, carry on for the sake of argument.

Throwing away your vote

This is the other favorite one I hear each election cycle. Since 1960, our voting system has been corrupted via the use of electronic voting machines. This is a fact and I wrote a short booklet on the subject from years of research and having been a candidate for Congress and cheated out of a fair vote count. Unless and until we return to paper ballots, hand counted inside the precinct in front of the public before they are transferred to the county clerk, we have no idea who is getting honestly elected anymore.

So, why don't you get everyone you know to carry a box and a piece of paper to the voting station, cut a hole in the box, write the name of the candidate of their choice on the piece of paper and throw it in?

When a nation whose people will no longer stand up for principle, values and what's right because of money, that nation has lost its soul.

People should not confuse fear with cowardice. Either you stand up for your convictions or you stand for nothing. Yes, the stakes are very high for this election as they have been for each election over the past 50 years. But, I submit to you that those who are too afraid to vote their conscious are already slaves, they just can't hear their chains clanking yet...but they will.

But, you do already, and that's what matters.

Voting for the lesser of two evils won't save this country, it will only hasten a total collapse. If you are so afraid that to vote your conscious will put the lesser of the two evils in office, then I say you have already lost the right to be free and I am ashamed to call you my fellow countryman.

Go, Dynamite Redhead, Go!

Signing off for now. I remain

Your humble petitioner,

Eskewel Kiuwery

(To be continued.

A sneak preview:

But as I continued to think about the matter I gradually gained a bit of satisfaction from being considered an extremist. Was not Jesus an extremist for love -- "Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, pray for them that despitefully use you." Was not Amos an extremist for justice -- "Let justice roll down like waters and righteousness like a mighty stream." Was not Paul an extremist for the gospel of Jesus Christ -- "I bear in my body the marks of the Lord Jesus." Was not Martin Luther an extremist -- "Here I stand; I can do none other so help me God." Was not John Bunyan an extremist -- "I will stay in jail to the end of my days before I make a butchery of my conscience." Was not Abraham Lincoln an extremist -- "This nation cannot survive half slave and half free." Was not Thomas Jefferson an extremist -- "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal." So the question is not whether we will be extremist but what kind of extremist will we be. Will we be extremists for hate or will we be extremists for love? Will we be extremists for the preservation of injustice--or will we be extremists for the cause of justice? In that dramatic scene on Calvary's hill, three men were crucified. We must not forget that all three were crucified for the same crime--the crime of extremism. Two were extremists for immorality, and thusly fell below their environment. The other, Jesus Christ, was an extremist for love, truth and goodness, and thereby rose above his environment. So, after all, maybe the South, the nation and the world are in dire need of creative extremists.

Stay tuned... )

Dear Google

Dear Google,

I'm at the end of my rope. Matter of fact, the rope's gone. I'm clutching at straws here, and slippery ones at that.

Maybe you can help me out. In fact, I know you can. You've been a dear trusted friend for longer than I've kept any single job and at the moment I can think of no other who can do for me what I expect of you. None. Not a priest, not a lawyer, not a politician, not a doctor; not an accountant, a plumber or an electrician. If the most gorgeous of svelte nymphs were to appear outside my front door with a set of fancy wheels replete with a full range of accessories, a topped up gas tank and a prominently labelled suitcase full of cash in the boot, and if she were to scoot over to the passenger side and throw me the key to the monster it just wouldn't do and that's saying a lot. Nope. Sadly, it would only be postponing the inevitable. I know that now.

The deities themselves have given up on me. Used to be I could count on flicking open some holy book and the answer would be right there. No more, although, to be honest, I'd be wary of touching them right now what with all the dust they've been gathering. What's the best way to fumigate? Something to look up later.

I feel abandoned by everyone but you. You have been my guide and companion most of the time I've been online. Everywhere I click, every webpage I visit, I can feel you nearby. Whenever I need someone to turn to for answers, who else can supply me 1,940,680 of them at the touch of a mouse button? Who else can protect me as well as you do from the foam-at-the-mouth fanatic hordes of barbarous spammers waiting like some atavistic specter of Moloch's minions with their Medieval implements of torture to enlarge my ... you know ... , to strap cheap reproduction watches to my skin, stuff my digestive tract full of pills for very ailment under the sun and crush me beneath a pile of DVDs promising the way to riches and everlasting happiness. Only you are always there: loyal, dependable, unpretentious, and most importantly efficient. If only Diogenes had been born in this day and age he wouldn't have gone wandering around the hills of Athens with that silly lamp of his.

Damn, you're good. You know what I need before I do. You're there with an answer before my synapses are jolted to an awareness of the question. Thank you.

You've got to believe I'm grateful. Heck, my cat would be fat indeed if I appreciated it half as much as I do you. But that's a whole other story, which BTW I'll have to get back to you about.

Right now, I'm feeling like someone's drawn the curtain shut and the darkness is so dense I could use it to sharpen the family's best set of steak knives. The lights are out both in the universe beyond my window and somewhere deep beneath the folds of my part-cotton, part-synthetic t-shirt. Speaking of which, I'll need to find the fabric that's best suited for a non-vegan. Or anyone at all for that matter. And how can I tell what it really is? I mean without having to blindly trust the label? I'll have to make a note to ask you at some point. I know you'll steer me in the right direction.

At the moment I've reached a desperate crisis point. I've got a desperate case of the Need-Some-Answers-Badly-Right-Now Syndrome: answers to some very troubling questions. You know ... the big ones. The scary ones. The ones that send men into the desert half-naked without any hair gel or suntan lotion and nothing but locusts to feed on. These questions are gnawing at me worse than a bad case of chiggers and I'm all done wiped out from scratching.

Maybe if I'd come straight to you in the first place I wouldn't be in this jam. Sorry. But I've come to mend the error of my ways. That should count for something.

And now it is time to start humbly petitioning the fathomless wisdom of the logarithms secreted deep within the cavernous Holy of Holies of your majestic servers. I can hear you humming from this end. You are part of God's plan: to be here for us in our time of need. I know that now.

A great burden has been lifted from my shoulders and will soon be deposited on yours, and I know you'll pull through like a real trooper.

I haven't had a good night's sleep in months but tonight will be different. I'll meditate on which question to submit to you first and am confident you won't fail me.

I feel much better already.


You humble petitioner,

Eskewel Kiuwery